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haf been sitting quietly at the side of my window staring blindly at the dark starless sky for a long long time thinking of him again...suddenly felt beri emo and lonely again...i haven been myself lately...ive changed sooo much for the past one month...hais...sometimes i feel certain things in life can reallie make a person grow up overnight...but there's side effects too...ive learnt certain things but loses my cheerfulness and optimistic character in return...life ish just liddat...u will definately lose something when u gain something...ironic but reallie true...my smile will onli come back when im wif my gers...but one of them left for her studies...sooo...yaaa...haf been feeling a lil incomplete since the minute she left...frens are my onli source of motivation now...i can nv imagine how topsy turvy my life will be if i dun haf them...shd be beri scary i guess...
im determined to go back to school now...haf been considering taking up fashion design instead of going for my degree in biomedical science...i wanna go for something i would wanna do for the rest of my life...must think far wad...cant be sooo childish to think for the present and dun gif a damn bout future rite...im turning 21 le...im not the rebellious;brainless teenage ger animore...wellz...i wanna open my own shop in future...den slowly expand from there...i noe biomed can make meee flirty rich in future but this ish just not the right path for meee laaa...i cant imagine myself sitting in the lab for the rest of my life...can u imagine that?!...if u can...den u think too highly of meee liao...or u dun understand meee enuff...lolx...i think ill bore myself to death lor...and my myopia will definately increase tremendously considering how mani specimens and chemicals i hafta stare at every single dae...den ill gradually lose touch wif the outside world...blah blah...i dun want tt to happen to meee lor...and once i chose biomed...i hafta stick to science-related jobs for the rest of my life...cant be i study biomed den go be a fashion designer wad...rite rite?my effort and time will be wasted if i decides to give up halfway through...i noe i will give up one dae...sooo might as well give up now and go for something i can stick to till retirement...lolx...dun wanna waste my time and mummie's money...hahaa...din expect myself to think sooo far...i shd gif myself a pat huh...lolx...
